~Goodbye letter for 2019~

24.12.2019

Arad, Romania

 

Dear 2019,

2019 you were such a good year for me even though you had started in the worst way ever, like really. I was surrounded by pain and darkness. I was in pain, my heart was broken by many people that , back then, I thought will never do horrible things to me that might hurt me badly.

    I was tired of everything. I was hopeless. But, as every story must continue ,with the help of my true and closest friends & my family, I had found a way back on the track. It was hard to move on, it was hard to start my recover when my thoughts were as black as the sky in the middle of the night. I’ve lost some people or better said they lost me, who I must say, I had cared and loved them more than anyone can ever imagine. You’ve put me get through a lot of changes this year. Changes that ended like presents from the Big Guy for me. One of the most important life lessons I’ve learnt is to love myself enough to put me first and to let go on people and things that no longer deserves my attention and also my love, that continue to be toxic in my life by constantly hurting me and not being even sorry for that. My dear 2019, you helped me fall in love with myself. This year I learnt to love, respect and take care of me by putting me first .

    I had worked hard at this blog, I invested a lot in myself, I learnt, took all my exams and now, here I am. At the end of the year, looking back at the old me, and being so damn proud of my hard work, of my willingness to change in better and to actually get better and also, right now, I’m very but very grateful for everything I have. It’s Christmas Eve and I’m writing my last article for this year, before my niece and nephew will come over to enjoy the born of Jesus together and also to wait for Santa Claus. This year I’ve learnt to have patience with myself, at every point in my life. At karate for example, school and here too. Sometimes I think that I’m not good enough, that it won’t work because I don’t have the skills that are requested, no matter the circumstances, but then I remember that the best people in the world had started from 0 too. Just by working hard and having patience everything will work out. In time, of course, because here is a thing that everyone is forgetting those days, GREAT THINGS TAKE TIME. It takes time to be good at something, it takes time to be one of the best . Sometimes there are bad days, horrible ones I can say, when your trust level is waaay down but you know what? You have to keep your head up and continue to do your thing even that you feel like the whole world is on your shoulders. Even that you feel that nothing works and everything falls apart. You don’t know how worried I can be sometimes when I’m writing my articles. Like I do worry because I want everything to be perfect, the design and the text to be in contrast, to not be gross , boring or something like that for the one who’s reading. There were times when writing kept me from going insane, when everything was just wrong and painful in my life. Here is my world I can say. Here I express myself, I do what I love to do and also, here I’m sharing details about my trips and vacations. 2019, you had taught me a lot of things. And one of my favourite thing that you taught me is that : THERE ALWAYS EXISTS A LIGHT IN THE DARKNESS. At the end of the tunnel, there is light. At the end of darkness, here is joy and life, in the real meaning of it.

 

    Nothing is permanent. We aren’t here forever, alive and also healthy and strong as now. Let’s be happy, let’s enjoy this life at maximum and be positive. For 2020 I have lots of plans and projects. One bigger than another. And as 2019 was my year , the year of my recovery and falling in love with myself ; 2020 is going to be my year too. One of the most successful years. After 2019 is 2020 right? :) Because as you can see, I won’t stop where I am. As God lets me, I’ll do my best. For me.

Let’s drink to that!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year my loves!!! See you in 2020!!!

 

'Smile, it's gonna be the best year of your life'

Much love,

~Lore^^