Hello everyone!

How are youuu? How have you been?

In this article I want to talk about forgiveness. Why? Because it’s truly important to forgive yourself and also to forgive others. So, let’s begin!

What is forgiveness?

Forgiveness it doesn’t mean always to forgive someone. Sometimes it means to forgive your past actions, yourself,  every bad memory and for remembering them.

It can be also a gift to yourself. It frees you from the past, the past experience, past relationships and the past false friendship. It allows you to live in the present time. When you forgive yourself and forgive others, you are indeed free.

I think in this life the hardest thing ever is to forgive someone. Someone you used to think about them as your friends and as your loved ones. You know, as I've said before, people change. Unfortunately, they do. Why? Still don’t know…actually, I can just suppose why. I’m not God to know what they think, the reason of their actions and behavior. Maybe sometimes I’m right, maybe sometimes I’m not, but one thing I can assure you is that: if those people who you were used to think about them as your friends, your loved ones have changed/are changing or are changed by someone and they let him/her to do so, they weren’t your friends from the beginning.

The people who are meant to be in your life, will be no matter what. They'll stay there, unchanged, next to you when you’ll need them and when you’ll be in your worst mood, not just when you’ll be happy and at your best, celebrating. Real friends are those who don’t give up on you, no matter how complicated you are as a person, no matter the issues they have, no matter what others tell them. Real friends aren’t jealous on what you have, they don’t change their behavior suddenly, and surely, they don’t ignore you for no reason or just because. And also, real friends support you, and are happy for you. For what you have realised, for what you have worked so far and for your good results.

Real is rare, and sometimes fake is very similar as real.

So yeah, I think the hardest thing is to forgive someone.

Firstly you get hurt.

And unfortunately it hurts so bad that sometimes you feel like you can’t breathe anymore, you want just to scream or cry because you’ve been betrayed and left at your worst by no one else but the people you once thought they'll be forever next to you. It’s normal.

I’ve been through this, not once, and let me tell you something: at this chapter of your life you can’t do anything about that. Why? Because we are people. We can’t stay isolated. If we do, we’ll soon not be people anymore, because it can drive us crazy. Really crazy. That’s why, when you choose your friends, you have to think twice. And also remember every time to put a border to your heart. Yes, they can come into your life but if they choose to leave, you won't be so affected as you would have been if you didn't put that border. I can't promise you that you won't get hurt, but at least you'll be less affected than without this border.

We are humans, we have feelings and as much as we want to say that we have a stone heart, we don’t. God made us this way, and if He didn’t change us until now, He will never do that. Why? Because that’s how things have to be.

Forgive yourself

To forgive yourself sometimes it can be very hard. Why?

Because all of us might have done something in the past that we aren’t proud of.

All of us have regrets and also sometimes we are so disappointed of no one but us, that we get lost in our own thoughts. In our own mind.

Have you ever thought that you aren’t just good enough for a lot of things? That you can’t do something when you actually can? That you will fail?

And the questions can keep going.

I’m sure in our life, every each of us had a similar question in our mind that just rolled over and over in our head. And the hardest way to move on, is when you’re mentally and emotionally down. Like really down. How do I know? Because I’ve been through that. When you’re broken , when everything goes wrong, just remember that you’re not alone and everything will pass. Everything. And also have faith. God never sleeps. Everything I’ve been through is that I was ready for it, even that I didn’t know at that time. I was stronger than I ever thought, and be sure that you are too. You can’t imagine the power that you have. Trust me, everything that happens in this life is not happening randomly, it’s happening this way because that’s our destiny. That’s how it is meant to be.

Also, you must make a decision that you are going to MOVE ON. It won’t happen automatically. You’ll have to rise up and say:

“I don’t care how hard this is, I don’t care how disappointed I am, I’m going to let this get the best of me, I’m moving on with my life.”

Also try to find yourself something to do, that helps you relax. It’s very important. For example, I’m doing karate. Karate for me is the best thing that has ever happened in my life so far. There is my second family. There I find myself every time. In that place, no one makes you feel bad or miserable, everyone focus on themselves to be better. To do better. To fight better. When I’m going to my training lessons, and when I dress up in my kimono, I swear, it’s like everything is finally on hold, and I can do what I love. Yes, it may be sound weird or scary, like how can be punching relaxing and all of that:)) Well it’s not just that, there you find your control, there you’re going to become a better person, like to learn how to be the one who has his life under control no matter the circumstances and how to keep your calm in the worst situations.

So yeah, that’s what this article is about. I have to admit that I’m still working on everything I wrote here, like to forgive myself and to forgive others. I can say that I have already forgiven some people, but I still have to forgive myself and others. And by time, I’ll do that. Why? Because that’s the first and the most important step to become happy. -like Shihan said

Smile, be kind and never forget that you can rise up in the middle of the war and still end it with the victory by your side.

Much love,